Thursday, July 21, 2011


The world is ending.  Some fight it, others embrace it.  Earlier today, I received the following message from a Jacksonville friend: 

Sorry, I had to meet with a client. Have I told you recently that I hate this job?

Let's move on to a topic of mutual hatred: Wal-Mart. Last night I almost lost my life because I seriously considered suicide-bombing the Wal-Mart on Atlantic blvd. As I finished serving papers last night I stopped into wal-mart to pick up a few things. As I walk through the front door my senses were assaulted by a wave of BO followed by the carrier, a 300 lb woman carrying a barrel of cheetos and a screaming infant. So already I'm annoyed/depressed/angry. I get in, get my groceries and get out. As I'm walking out the door, a man who is sitting slumped against the wall two feet from the door shouts at me "In the name of Jesus Christ, can you please help a guy out, god bless you". Now... as you know, he's already started off on the wrong foot if he wants my help. But factor in the fact that I just finished up my two-job 14 hour day of work AND that he is begging for money outside the one place on earth that will hire just about anyone that can walk, limp or drag themself through the door, I would have blown myself up right then and there if I had the ability.

Wal-Mart is the bane of all that is good and the world would instantly be a better place if they were all destroyed during their peak operating hours. 

Sorry, Pal (who asked to remain anonymous).  On the bright side, if you go through with it, there'll be seven union card-carrying, small business owners waiting  with hammers and sickles to welcome you into Keynesian Heaven.

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